* * *

* * * * *

* * * * * * *

* * * * * * * * *

050 - I BEG YOUR PARDON by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 15 Dec 1995

Excuse me

Who are you calling a son of a bitch

You only met my mom the one time

It takes one to know one fine

- - -

Excuse me

Who are you calling an arsehole

Couldn't agree more that I'm full of shit

What comes out of your mouth is just as rich

- - -

Excuse me

Who are you telling to go to hell

Your life was just a bed of roses

And I was blind as someone supposes

- - -

Excuse me

Who are you telling to just fuck off

I can't recall who was on the scene

When you first learned what the F-word means

- - -

Excuse me

Who are you

- - -

Excuse me

What are you

- - -

Excuse me

Why are you …

- - -

Who am I talking to

* * * * *

049 - CRY by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 11 Dec 1995

Tell me why, so, I find

To speak truth, I honestly lie

Mother, I don't want to cry

- - -

Tell me why, to be alive

I gotta fight, I gotta try

Mother, I don't want to cry

- - -

Tell me why, raven, dove

I need to lose to prove I love

Mother, I don't want to cry

- - -

Tell me why, society ploys

Only the girls can love the boys

Mother, I don't want to cry

- - -

Tell me why, eyes turn green

When I have all the means

Mother, I don't want to cry

- - -

Tell me why the end is nigh

I have to live, only to die

Mother, I don't want to cry

- - -

Tell me why

Mother, I

Don't want to cry

* * * * *

048 - ONE-TWO-SIX by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 6 Dec 1995

Chorus:

Up at Cairnhill, I'm closer to God

Up at Cairnhill, we're a happier lot

Up at Cairnhill, your self you find

Up at Cairnhill, I can be mine

Verse:

It's eight in the morning and I'm still dreaming

The birds are tweeting and the air is chilling

Chorus:

Up at Cairnhill, I'm closer to God

Up at Cairnhill, we're a happier lot

Up at Cairnhill, your self you find

Up at Cairnhill, I can be mine

Verse:

Prata kosong from Newton, some Nescafe gayung

And I know for certain, as far as punctuality's concerned

Chorus:

Up at Cairnhill, I'm closer to God

Up at Cairnhill, we're a happier lot

Up at Cairnhill, your self you find

Up at Cairnhill, I can be mine

Verse:

Three, four hours will be nice. Maybe go at it twice

Can't do it for too long, just in case we do it wrong

Chorus:

Up at Cairnhill, I'm closer to God

Up at Cairnhill, we're a happier lot

Up at Cairnhill, your self you find

Up at Cairnhill, I can be mine

Verse:

Well, I guess, I'll see you, now that we're through

Come up with something new, something worthwhile to do

Chorus:

Up at Cairnhill, I'm closer to God

Up at Cairnhill, we're a happier lot

Up at Cairnhill, your self you find

Up at Cairnhill, I can be mine

Bridge:

Please tell me I am wrong

All of it seems so wrong

All of us can't be wrong

Chorus:

Up at Cairnhill, I'm closer to God

Up at Cairnhill, we're a happier lot

Up at Cairnhill, your self you find

Up at Cairnhill, I can be mine

* * * * *

047 - KYLEE by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 4 Dec 1995

He knows what's good for me

Gave me an education free

Gave my friends another classroom

It happened much too soon

- - -

He has an adolescent plan

Two years, six months, in the can

When I come out, I stand

I was already a man

- - -

He allows me not to ask why

Not to laugh and not to cry

My-nute air-space not for free

Can anyone really hear me

- - -

He found a place to age

Finally gave me a stage

To meet my children's children

I don't want to be a burden

- - -

Pay And Pay

Please And Please

Pray And Pray

Perish And Perish

* * * * *

046 - LAGU UNTUK ANNE by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 4 Sep 1995

Verse:

Pada setiap langkah

Ada niat dan padah

Pada silap dan salah

Ada hikmat terserlah

- - -

Tiada penyelesaian dan ketetapan

Kau terpaksa meneruskan

Tanpa menghiraukan ketentuan

Chorus:

Diam berfikir dahulu

Jangan ikut perasaan mu

Memang darah muda begitu

Terlalu turutkan nafsu

Verse:

Pagi hari bermula

Maghrib 'kan mengakhirnya

Bagi malam gelita

Fajar akan menjelma

- - -

Tiada penyelesaian dan ketetapan

Kau terpaksa meneruskan

Tanpa menghiraukan ketentuan

Chorus:

Diam berfikir dahulu

Jangan ikut perasaanmu

Memang darah muda begitu

Terlalu turutkan nafsu

Bridge:

Malam bersiang

Kegelapan, terang

Embun, udara, hujan

Mulut berlidah

Hati, suara

Memanah kata bukan-bukan

Wira berdara

Disuluh purnama

Menuju arah mana

Chorus:

Diam berfikir dahulu

Jangan ikut perasaanmu

Memang darah muda begitu

Terlalu turutkan nafsu

* * * * *

045 - RAINWATER by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 6 Aug 1995

rain

tears

cheers

jeers

smears

spears

steers

us

* * * * *

044 - I by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 6 Aug 1995

I don't know

I am alone

I want nothing

I have nothing

I have no one

I am free

I am he

God is me

* * * * *

043 - EXECUTIVE GUTS by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 12 Jul 1995

I open my eyes with the sunrise.

Laboriously get out of bed.

My head I hose down to my toes.

My soul, some prayers said.

- - -

The hair, the face, no time to waste,

Dressed up, all but my feet,

Splash on cologne, intestines groan,

"Hey man, when do we eat?"

- - -

Rush off to work to please 'big jerk'.

For starters, "Good morning, sir!"

To wife and child, configured smile,

Homicidal fantasies stir.

- - -

Get down and dirty. On paper, pretty,

And when, with clients, meet.

Diplomatic dealing, intestines twisting,

"Hey man, when will we eat?"

- - -

Proposition bore. That client must score

An I.Q. below her hemline.

Plan 'B', she likes. Modestly, he strikes

Up the band, saying, his what's mine.

- - -

In my heart, I say, this is the day

I stop dancing to his beat.

If my mind could speak, intestines shriek,

"Hey man, when can we eat?"

* * * * *

042 - COFFEE CUP by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 9 Jul 1995

Verse:

When I saw your face this morning

I was drying upside down

Stared in your face ignored me

Your head still spinning 'round

Verse:

Picked me up with your right hand

Filled me to the brim

Stirred me up with healthy helping

Of powder, sugar and cream

Chorus:

Take me up the stairs to your room

Take me into hell

Take my insides out into you

To your wishing well

I'll take you

To your wishing well

Verse:

Did mama's boy up and leave you

For the very last time

Did he say "I love you."

When you said "Are you mine?"

Verse:

Did you, then, feel you really want to

Give him what only you can

He had to go to be back for you

And you thought "What a man!"

Chorus:

Take me up the stairs to your room

Take me into hell

Take my insides out into you

To your wishing well

I'll take you

To your wishing well

* * * * *

041 - NON-SENSE by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 30 Jun 1995

LOOK

at me

when I speak

you may hear each word

and still not understand

LISTEN

honestly

with an open mind

the piercing silence shrieks

a blinding light in darkness

TOUCH

the darkness

feel the silence

wallow in the fear

permeate the yet-unknown

SMELL

it out

the hidden nest

a treasure chest

awaiting, avoiding, amocking

TASTE

victory

fanfare in celebration

ignorant in arrogance

loss, lost, and still losing

* * * * *

040 - THE HUNGER by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 24 May 1995

Feed me

To the sharks

Let me swim in the dark

Without you, naked, stark

- - -

Feed me

To the whales

Water-sheltered from the gale

I will, their wombs, impale

- - -

Feed me

To the dogs

Man-trained tame wild hogs

In eleventh-hour-frenzy smog

- - -

Feed me

To the trees

Be my last breath a breeze

Only, will you, then, feed me free

* * * * *

039 - DO YOU LOVE ME by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 20 Apr 1995

Chorus:

Do you love me, Do you love me, Do you love, too

Verse:

Do you know who I am

Do you even give a damn

I can't tell you, no one can

Did you get that dress at Tang's?

Chorus:

Do you love me, Do you love me, Do you love me, too

Verse:

Do you know what I can do

If I had a minute or two

If you would, I will show you

But, you always show up late

Chorus:

Do you love me, Do you love me, Do you love me, too

Verse:

Do you know where I come from

Where a nigger's Uncle Tom

Around a black bonfire keep warm

You're no nigger, I'm only me

Chorus:

Do you love me, Do you love me, Do you love me, too

Verse:

Do you know what I would give

If you didn't have to live

On what, from mother, you receive

I didn't, couldn't know mine

Bridge:

And I love you

I really love you

More than my song, I love you, but

Chorus:

Do you love me, Do you love me, Do you love me, too

* * * * *

038 - WHO by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 17 Apr 1995

Chorus:

I used to have a life

I used to have a wife

I used to have a daughter, maybe two

I still remember fondly

But, was that man me, really

I don't know, I do remember you

Verse:

Mister, can you spare twenty cents? I really need the loo.

Life is hard on Orchard Road for us both, me and you.

- - -

No? Well, a dollar is fine. I'll change at the door.

Not nice, a man my age messing up the marble floor.

- - -

Miss, you have a dollar, too? I lost my wallet somewhere.

Thank you. Dinner later and lunch tomorrow. You won't be there.

Chorus:

I used to have a life

I used to have a wife

I used to have a daughter, maybe two

I still remember fondly

But, was that man me, really

I don't know, I do remember you

Verse:

We met at Geylang Serai, Block Three, void deck coffee shop.

That night, you gave me ten dollars. I wasn't asleep at that bus stop.

- - -

At Chinatown, I saw you again behind O.G., near People's Park.

Rain soaked the cardboards and I that night. It was cold and dark.

- - -

I walked here from Serangoon. Not far for the warm underpass.

I'll phone home. What's the number? I'll tell them we met again, at last.

Chorus:

I used to have a life

I used to have a wife

I used to have a daughter, maybe two

I still remember fondly

But, was that man me, really

I don't know, I do remember you

* * * * *

037 - I DON'T WANT TO MARRY YOUR PARENTS by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 18 Mar 1995

I don't want to marry you parents

Though we both know I've got the talent

I don't want to have to break free

They don't want to have to have me

So I don't want to marry your parents

- - -

And the day I arrived, met your brother's wife

Their delight, future flight, I could stay

Then my hair grew long, all I did was wrong

They're too big to see things my way

- - -

And I had a haircut, they stared hard, stared long, but

Could not see beyond what was on

I believe by the time they put reason to rhyme

Our sin-love be, but, long dead and gone

- - -

You remember the ring meant for our wedding

Their surprise reaction was plain

Throw it all away, you don't need it, no way

With two wheels, handle, pedal and chain

- - -

Do I honestly love you, do I ever show you

Soul, heart and mind, how'd they know

They persistently insist, I consistently resist

Where our life takes us, they can't go

- - -

Was it something I said, or something I read

Made your daddy a different man

Your mommy agreed, what I've got, you don't need

Even if I give all I can

- - -

Their ultimatum today read there's only one way

That, between you and I, it would be

I can never hit you, I can never leave you

It didn't say I need them with me

- - -

I don't want to marry your parents

Though we both know I've got the talent

I don't want to have to break free

They don't want to have to have me

So I don't want to marry your parents

* * * * *

036 - THE REASON by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 10 Mar 1995

Verse:

He was an old man who lived on the hill

I met him on my way down

Though he was resting, his hands weren't still

Feeding his anger, suppressing, he frowns

Chorus:

"Do you know who? Do you try to?

Young man, now, don't you cry.

It's been that way. Thus will it stay.

And you are the reason why."

Verse:

"Is there hope for better than there is today?"

He looked at me and smiled

"Is there, out there, unbeknownst, a better way?"

Relieved, he paused a long while

Chorus:

Do you know who? Do you try to?

Young man, now, don't you cry.

It's been that way. Thus will it stay.

And you are the reason why."

Verse:

"What twisted plan brought this place to me?"

He turned, then, a real smile

"What secrets you have would you not let out free?"

Relieved, paused a long, long while

Chorus:

"Do you know who? Do you try to?

Young man, now, don't you cry.

It's been that way. Thus will it stay.

And you are the reason why."

Verse:

"Why do people with nothing to say speak when

My friends' tongues cannot make a sound?

Why do people with no where to go peak when

Me friends' feet never leave the ground."

Chorus:

"Do you know who? Do you try to?

Young man, now, don't you cry.

It's been that way. Thus will it stay.

And you are the reason why."

Verse:

He stood up, tremblingly, tentatively reached to edge

I followed, hair raised on pores

Pointed out below at the spread sky-scraped stage

He left as he said "Yours."

Chorus:

Then I knew who, I will try to

A man, I do not cry

It's been that way, thus will it stay

And I am the reason why

* * * * *

035 - COMMON MAN by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 7 Mar 1995

Verse:

You dropped out, I scored straight 'A's

You straightened up, I just want to play

You settled down, I don't need to get laid

In God you trust, how I pray

Verse:

I guess you don't smoke what I smoke

I rev it up, you have a stroke

I'm spent, you refuse to go broke

And you say my life is a joke

Chorus:

Why can't you see how I see? Why can't you let me live free?

Why don't you just let me be? I just got to be me!

Verse:

You duck so I can take the blow

I only eat the things that you throw

You sail away, I go against the flow

Look, up in the sky, you can from below

Verse:

We live on the same big blue ball

We take a trip, how we both fall

Born to ride, we first learned to crawl

Let's now, both, stand tall

Chorus:

Why can't you see how I see? Why can't you let me live free?

Why don't you just let me be? I just got to be me!

- - -

Take me for what I am. I'll give you all I can.

No more, no less, your man. You need me as me. Then?

Verse:

I say 'hello', you say 'why'

I say 'good-bye', you say 'die'

I say 'stand up', you say 'cry'

I say, that how you fly?

Verse:

I do a lot, you do not

I can't recall, you forgot

I'd like to afford, you just bought

And what have I got

Chorus:

Why can't you see how I see? Why can't you just let me live free?

Why don't you just let me be? I just got to be me!

* * * * *

034 - ALWAYS WRONG by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 28 Feb 1995

Introduction:

*Handy said "No eye for eye". Hendry* said "I kiss the sky".

Lenny* said "I wanna hold thy …". Did you hear? Neither did I.

Verse:

They told Ah Ter," Here have two,

If you know what's good for you."

So he did. "Now, Siau Ter, Junior, you

Keep two jobs just to pull us through."

Verse:

They told Mary," Go away.

Don't come back another day."

But, Mary, A-mat with might play.

So, that way they let her stay.

Chorus:

I don't know if you'll hear my song. I don't know if I'll still be strong.

I don't know why we're always wrong. But, I know we belong.

Verse:

They told Raja," You're too tuff!"

But, the money's not enough.

"Here, have a drop more, have a cuff."

Just to have a, slow ride, rough.

Verse:

They told Johnny, "This is life.

House, car, money, monkey wife."

Happrosperiprogrestrife,

Tone deaf to the piper's fife.

Chorus:

I don't know if you'll hear my song. I don't know if I'll still be strong.

I don't know why we're always wrong. But, I know we belong.

Verse:

They told Yours Truly, "Just get your 'A'.

Then you can 'B' what we say."

My life - sculpture out of clay.

Nice to look at, if broken, pay.

Verse:

They told Yours Truly, "Do as we do

When we choose one for all of you."

For what there was, I choose not to.

Faithfully, I'm fined, and I thank you.

Chorus:

I don't know if you'll hear my song. I don't know if I'll still be strong.

I don't know why we're always wrong. But, I know we belong.

* * * * *

033 - FAR CAR MARY CAR by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 31 Jan 1995

Chorus:

farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar

Verse:

Don't tell me how to deal with father

He slaps my wrist for shouting at mother

While you are having tea with father

Your son is out deboning another

Chorus:

farcar farcarmarycar farcar faracrmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar

Verse:

Don't tell me I could be better

You fuck with me, I'll fuck your mother

Your sister, too, and when I do her

I'll let the whole world know we're brothers

Chorus:

farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar

Verse:

Don't tell me brother is brother, not

When you find out he confessed to your God

He fought for me, now we fight a lot

We keep our fights to our own black lot

Chorus:

farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar

Verse:

Don't tell me the sun's too hot

You made me do what you could not

In God's back lot, we're just a spot

In a big bang, gone, he'll miss us, not

Chorus:

farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar

Verse:

Don't tell me my wife is course

I didn't see who's doing yours

She sweats, she smells, her sinus snores

She's no songbird and she's not yours

Chorus:

farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar

Verse:

Don't tell me to sharpen my claws

All us neighbours keep open doors

You keep on saying we all have flaws

Concertedly, we say "Up yours!"

Chorus:

farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar farcar farcarmarycar

* * * * *

032 - ME AND MY WOMAN by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 1994

Verse:

It wasn't long ago I got my first guitar

Didn't know where I'd go, I didn't know how far

Set off on that road, went down and round the town

In times so bad I swore that nothing would tie me to the ground

Verse:

It wasn't long ago things started going wrong

Being at Number One was where I don't belong

Things I'd have died for had put the chains on me

Even if it meant my life, I swear I'd still be free

Chorus:

You were always there for me

I will always try to be

The one that you

Can always come crying to

And love

Verse:

I know I'm no God, I know I make mistakes

But, I'm never giving up, no matter what it takes

With your faith in me, I'll take it in my stride

Until we're riding way up high, it's me and my woman

* * * * *

031 - MELAYU by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 1992

Verse:

Kata Tuah, "Tak Melayu hilang di dunia." Apakah benar?

Sampai bila akan kita terus berserah pada pujangga?

Chorus:

Tiada usaha.

Tiada jaya.

Tiada cuba.

Hanya masa mengulasnya

Verse:

"Genggam bara api hingga menjadi arang," itulah azam.

Hati cekal, kail sejengkal terus membaham lautan dalam.

Chorus:

Tiada gentar.

Tapi pintar.

Tiada ketar.

Hanya sabar berikhtiar.

Bridge:

Mestikah Melayu melayu?

Perlukah Melayu merayu?

Mengapa Melayu terpaku

Dan hanya meminta dibantu?

Semat di hati semangat berdikari.

"Oh, ku berdikari!"

* * * * *

030 - IF I COULD FIND A WAY by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 1991

Verse:

I can't understand

Why things seem to always end

At just about the time

They feel so right

Verse:

You don't really know

How far my heart would go

To be by your side

Holding you tight

Chorus:

If I could find a way

To make you stay

Forever close to me

I would be there

- - -

And I will be loving you

I'll always do

If I could find a way

To make you stay

Verse:

There'll be no moon tonight

And the stars won't be shining bright

No loving warm embrace

As you turn away

* * * * *

029 - NAK CAKAP APA by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 1990

Verse:

Pagi-pagi pergi ke kedai kopi

Beli makan untuk anak dan isteri

Satu pagi bersembang, tak kering gusi

Sampai rumah, lepak satu hari

Chorus:

Tidur diam, tapi tak lena

Hati risau, bilalah nak kerja

Makan, minum, rumah tak terjaga

Duit tak'da, nak cakap apa

Verse:

Sini, sana pergi mencari kerja

Itu berat, yang ini masa tak kena

Cukup bulan, orang lain berbelanja

Tapi abang (hmh!) terpinga-pinga

Chorus:

Dapat kerja, gajinya tak seberapa

Sekadar makan cukup sentiasa

Sihat kerja, sakit pun terima

Duit tak'da, nak cakap apa

Verse:

Tapi abang punya cita-cita tinggi

Ingin hantar anak ke universiti

Juga belikan isteri yang serba-serbi

Cukupkan syarat-syarat sebelum pergi

Chorus:

Tapi dapatnya tak tahu bila

Kerja mana, keluarga ke mana

Cita-cita tinggal hanya cita-cita

Duit tak'da, nak cakap apa

* * * * *

028 - SUATU MALAM (a.k.a. HAKISAN MARUAH) by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 1990

Verse:

Ku dengar sorak anak muda

Dalam kebingitan suasana

Minum, ketawa dan berpesta

Tak kira usia atau jantina

Verse:

Ku dengar jeritan anak dara

Dalam kehangatan satu fantasia

Terperkosa jiwa dan juga maruah

Tanpa percikan air mata

Chorus:

Dalam keasyikan, saling menghiburkan

Dalam kealpaan keciciran

Verse:

Ku dengar nyanyian ibu tua

Dalam kegilaan temasya dunia

Mengorak langkah bagi anaknya

Berdestinasikan api neraka

Chorus:

Dalam kecanduan, tiada batasan

Dalam angan-angan kehancuran

* * * * *

027 - AN ORCHESTRA SYMPHONY by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 1989

There's a place I knew, and you might, too,

Around the corner at Empress Place

Where the kids are bold, the women, cold,

And the men, no man would face.

They get to meet a few times a week

In the little Victorian room

And there they'd play all night, all day,

Under the master's Wand of Doom.

When the screechings start, it's not real hard

To see how things are done,

For the master frowns at all the sounds

Of the people having fun.

But when they're through, no sooner, too,

There is silence in the dome,

For they take heed with lightning speed

When it comes to going home

Quick - settle down; Slow - getting around;

Quick - pack up and go off early.

This is the strife in their daily life -

An Orchestra Symphony.

* * * * *

026 - PERCUSSION by Gene Sha Rudyn, Singapura, 1989

"So full of physical improvisation,"

Thought pani of the instruments Percussion.

The big Bass Drum rolls, breaking the still.

And the cheerful sounds of the Glocken, spiel.

Then, marching in smartly on the Side,

Two sticks together, stride per stride.

The Xylo phones home at the back.

Mum says, "Tri, an, gle, don't leave the pack."

Finally, the leader, bigger than many,

Says, "No one messes with my Tim, pani!"

* * * * * * * * *

* * * * * * *

* * * * *

* * *

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